LOOKING BACK ON THE WEEKEND

Today I am in the second day of a cold: 'nuff said. We did have a pretty good weekend before it hit me, however. Now I'll just stay in and take it easy.

Every year the club hosts a Seafood dinner, which includes oyster stew, already peeled shrimp, and a whole Maine lobster, just to name a few items. We always take Jim IV and Laurie and this year Brenda and her friend Tony were able to join us, also. We had a great time, needless to say, all dressed in our plastic bibs and chowing down on a great meal. There was also some fancy dancing going on (obviously, some of the members spend a great deal of time and money at Arthur Murray), but we forewent it this time.

Then on Saturday morning we went to the funeral of a friend of ours from church. That's never a fun experience, but the service was upbeat. I also went to lunch afterwards with my first grade friends, Judy and Janice. I always enjoy getting caught up on their news.

Brenda came by this weekend and saw the house for the first time in a while. She said that it looks much better than the pictures I put online. So if you have seen only the pictures, just take it up a notch or two in your mind and you will have the real thing.

Interestingly enough, Brenda and I talk every morning for 20 - 30 minutes, and that's the first time I've seen her in ages. I'm grateful for our conversations so we can keep in touch.

NOW! I'm going to go to bed or maybe lie in the sun and try to dry out the cold.

LUNCHEON

As mentioned yesterday we had another high school lunch get-together today. Fourteen people attended and we all sat around a big square table. It was great because we could either talk to those around us or to the whole table at once. I enjoy these affairs so much and this one was no exception.

Patsy had been given another award -- she was added to the public school hall of fame -- and she told us all about her visit back to the school. Sounds like it is very run down and in need of fixing up.

One of us suggested that maybe somebody should burn the school down like it did 57 years ago and just build a new one. It's hard to believe that that happened that long ago. But the building there now is the one that was finished up in 1955 just in time for the genius and his class to graduate.

I'm not surprised that it is need of repair. First of all, the building is old, and secondly, there are a lot more students attending now. And thirdly, the problems with the present day kids are much worse than when we attended.

We all agreed that we had it made in the fifties. I threw out the question of anyone's ever seeing alcohol any time we were in high school. One or two of the boys said they did, but certainly not very much, and none of the girls had seen it. Drugs were unheard of except for nicotine and that we did see: many of us smoked every now and then. That was the biggest "sin" unless you count what went on in some of the parked cars on dates.

That was probably somewhat like today, except no one talked about it. The subject was strictly taboo in mixed company and even with our own sex!!

Anyway, the picture of the attendees is below.

Ah, a nice rainy day. (I can't believe I'm saying that.) There's something about spring rain that is different than any other time of the year. It's refreshing and cleansing, kind of like crying at a sad movie (like Marley and Me). I'll just plan to stay in enjoy myself.

I took the dogs to the groomers today. Of course, they didn't want to go in and I had to chase them all the car to get both of them. They were in dire need -- the groomer said Rufus looked like a "fluff ball."

Actually, I do have an inside job planned for me today: switching closets around. It's such a pain to do, and then no sooner do I get it done and the weather shifts and I'm back in the other closet digging out clothes to wear. But the time has come -- I've been in the off season closet too many times lately trying to decide what to put on. I'm about to run out of ideas for transition clothes, but I don't want it to get hot either. So I'm not complaining.

I do like living in an area where there are four seasons, especially when it's fall or spring. The daffodils have come and almost gone, but the redbud is in full bloom in the front yard. The dogwood will be next and then my gorgeous hydrangea bush. They have huge purplish pink blossoms that are just beautiful. Someone said at bridge club the other day that you should put a certain kind of fertilizer on them depending on whether you wanted pink or blue flowers. Since mine are in between, I guess I'll just leave them alone like I always have and enjoy the color.

Tomorrow is the Burro Babes luncheon and we've invited the men, too (Should we call them buddies or bubbas?) I always look forward to seeing them and catching up with their latest news.

I'll let you know how it turns out. And maybe even put a picture of us on the blog!!

BACK TO DECORATING

Yesterday I had a nice leisurely, "unstructured" day, doing what I wanted when I wanted. It was nice! I ended up going to Home Depot -- again -- and managed to spend an hour there.

I've never had to make so many decisions regarding color, texture, size, shape, etc. as I have these last two months. Yesterday was just another day of doing that. But I finally picked out the vanity top, sink color, towel racks, and a toilet paper holder for the bathroom. I have yet to decide on the new toilet, but I did a lot of looking and measuring. I have mixed emotions about giving up my old john that has a jet flush and switching to one that is water saving (but not if I have to flush it twice every time!). I also have to choose the faucets, but that looks fairly easy.

One thing this experience has taught me: you can spend a LOT of money if you want to (or even if you don't) on redecorating. I've really tried to be careful about that, but sometimes I have gotten caught up in wanting the best. Case in point was my selection of tub/shower installation: I elected to go the cheaper route of putting in the acrylic lining as opposed to tearing out and starting over, but I chose the "cadillac version" (according to the salesman) and I don't regret it. And I selected granite over laminate or fake marble for the vanity and don't regret that either. But I absolutely wouldn't let myself get carried away by brushed nickel or bronze or brass for the faucets -- chrome is fine. And so it has gone, over and over until I'm just about ready to stop and enjoy what we have. The kitchen will have to wait.

Besides, the next big thing I want to do is put hardwood in the living/dining room and kitchen. But that's for another day.

BREAK TIME IS OVER

Alas!! Spring break is over, but it was great while it lasted. Gone are the sleeping in, the genius in relaxed mode, and the delicious meals at night. But to look on the bright side: Gone are the "planned days" where every minute is accounted for!

A typical day during the break began with my sleeping till 8:00 or 9:00 while the genius took care of Rufus's needs. Then by the time I got up he was "starving" and wanting his breakfast. So as soon as my feet hit the floor it was to go to the kitchen and prepare sausage, biscuits, toast, eggs, etc. Coffee came later many times. You can imagine my efforts of trying not to be too grouchy during this hour; after all, he had allowed me to sleep while he fed, walked, played with Rufus. But, as most of you know, this is not my best hour of the day.

But I tried and most of the time was able to carry it off with a minimum of dropping things as I stumbled around the kitchen.

Then I would sit and have my coffee while we "planned the day." Quite frankly, this was difficult to do before a caffeine shot, so I usually just yielded to whatever he wanted to do. One day it was get new tires for the Accord, on another it was go to Costco, or grocery shopping at Walmart, etc. Just mundane things that have to be done in life. But every night was topped off by a fabulous meal usually at a new restaurant we hadn't tried before.

Whenever I mentioned how much we were spending, the genius's reply was, "Well, we are saving on motel bills and plane fare or gas money by staying here, and we still have the good meals!"

And then last night we topped off the whole vacation by going to TPAC and watching Jersey Boys, the story of The Four Seasons, a group that was popular in the 60's. We enjoyed it thoroughly and it was a good way to end our ten days of "vacationing."

But I must admit to a sigh of relief this morning when I arose and could get used to being awake by degrees and let the day plan itself!!

SPRING BREAK

The genius and I have once again been eating our way through his spring break. Every night we try out a new restaurant so we can have a memorable experience and also so we can have a new list to fall back on. We have several to add to the list.

Last night we tried City House, an Italian place in Germantown. First we started with their homemade pizza as an appetizer, then went on to the main course. The genius had steak with a delicious sauce and I had a pasta dish. Then I also had a dessert that was a kind of a tart made with a cornmeal based crust and filled with dried blood red oranges with homemade whipped cream on top. It was really unusual and really good!

We have sampled Italian twice, Asian fusion, global fusion, seafood, ecclectic, and Mexican. By far the best one for me was the global one -- Mambu's -- on Hayes Street in the midtown section. I know a lot depends on what a person orders on a particular night, but I hit a winner that night. We will definitely go back there.
They've all been good, though, I haven't had anything I didn't like.

We've also progressed on the house, although much more slowly than before because of the weather. When it is good, Jim IV is on the court, teaching; only when it is raining does he come over to work. He now has the bathroom painted and the walls of the bedroom done. He still has the woodwork to do in the bedroom and some little odd jobs left. He's done a great job and I am very happy with our "new house."

And we're ready for company, so bring it on!!! Come visit and stay in one of the new suites!

NEW PICTURES

Everyone in the family has been after me to put some pictures of the new tub/shower on the blog so here they are. I love taking a shower now, especially with the curved shower rod that makes it feel so roomy. The problem now is that everything else looks shabby. I feel the urge to spend more money coming on so I can replace the toilet and vanity top. Will it never end???

BJ and Jerry came for dinner on Saturday night and of course, brought Monty. So I stuck a picture of Rufus and him on here, too.

THE YEARS FOLLOWING

When I look back at all this and count the years, I can scarcely believe that it occurred almost 40 years ago. The vision is still just as real to me today as it was the morning after. But the years since then have been filled with other experiences, both negative and positive.

In the first place, the genius’s walk was much different from mine, as you might imagine. He didn’t have any “Road to Damascus” experience, and while he thought it was great for me, he had to find his own way on the spiritual path. So little by little, in an intellectual way, he began his own search. And over the years he has developed a solid faith that is dependable and meaningful for him and comforting for me. Someone once compared women and men in their spiritual walks by saying women are the kindling of a fire and men are the back logs. I don’t know about all couples, but that analogy is pretty accurate for us. The genius is just so steady and I am sometimes on an emotional roller coaster.

Secondly, finding a church over the years has been a real challenge for us. Good preaching and music are the two things we looked for, but what pleased me didn’t necessarily appeal to the genius. I didn’t care if the service was unstructured and had contemporary music, whereas he wanted a traditional service and the hymns he had grown up with. I liked the hymns, too, but didn’t particularly want to be tied to the same old cold services with opera-type singers in the choir.

We visited and/or joined Methodist, Presbyterian, Baptist, Episcopal, even Nazarene churches all over the city, but all of them left something to be desired for one or both of us. Finally, a few years ago, the genius attended a funeral for a former IBMer and came home raving about the preacher who did the service. I agreed to visit the church with him and we did so some weeks later.

From the very first, we both felt like we had at last found a place we really loved. We already knew many of the people, some we had grown up with and hadn’t seen for years, and others, as well. So, after 33 years of searching, we had finally found a church for both of us. It is mostly traditional, but not frozen in the past, so I can enjoy the services and other weekly events also. Our minister and the choir are just what we like and enjoy each week.

I trust that we have both grown spiritually over the years through thick and thin; I am certainly not the giddy believer I first was, nor is the genius the doubter he was at one time. We have both matured over the years and are learning to rely on each other spiritually as well as intellectually, as we always have done.

I’m not saying we have arrived, but we are much farther along than we were some 40 years ago,

THE AFTERMATH

When I awoke the morning after I had my “encounter,” I had much to contemplate. I was struck by the fact that I didn’t know Who my visitor had been – was the person Jesus, as I suspected? I thought he had died and gone to heaven, so this didn’t seem likely. Was it an angel? No, I thought, it was too much like a divine Being. I didn’t believe that it was a dream nor a figment of my imagination --- the whole experience was the most “real” thing that had ever happened to me. But I had many questions, so I decided to turn to the Bible and see if I could find answers.

My pastor had recently suggested that I get a modern version of the Bible and start reading it, and I had. But the words didn’t mean much to me; it was like reading a history book that was not really very interesting. I couldn’t understand that something that had happened 2000 years ago could hold much meaning for me. But that morning I decided to try again.

An astonishing thing happened: the words almost jumped off the page at me! I started at Matthew and began reading and suddenly it all began to make sense. I think this experience amazed me as much as the night before! And over the next few weeks I couldn’t get enough; I read straight through the New Testament and started over again, underlining and writing notes in the margin. The more I read, the more excited I became.

Of course, I discussed the entire episode with my pastor, who was very encouraging and helpful. He helped me to see that Jesus is still alive and well and what’s more, very active in the world through His Spirit. The Holy Spirit was something (Someone, I now saw) that I had never thought much about, but now I began to look for references in Scripture and there He was – all throughout the books, both Old and New Testaments. The Book of Acts, particularly, explained His place and purpose in our lives, but I had never seen it. He was (is) the power behind the throne, so to speak.

My family began to notice a real change in me. Who was this joyful, peaceful person who had replaced the old sometimes depressed, sometimes irritable wife and mother? Of course, I told the genius about my experiences and also talked to the children about God and began to pray with them. And for a few weeks or months all was rosy in our household.

Tomorrow I will discuss the years since my remarkable transformation.

MY ENCOUNTER

As I mentioned yesterday, I had begun to explore the venue of prayer as a means of communicating with God, Whom I now believe existed. The first area in which I saw an answer was in my effort to quit smoking.

For years I had tried to quit to no avail. I had even smoked during my three pregnancies, although I did cut back. I can still remember the wonderful taste of coffee (which had tasted awful during the nine months) and a cigarette after giving birth. And yes, I smoked even though I breast fed all three of my babies. I hated myself for being so controlled by a drug, but I couldn’t seem to break the power it had over me. So I was very willing to pray about this with my pastor.

I quit cold turkey, suffered physical withdrawals for about a week, all the time praying that this time I would be successful. And the good news is that I was able to kick the habit, although I must say that I miss it to this day. Cigarettes were my good friend and now they were gone out of my life.

When I saw an actual answer to prayer, my tiny little mustard seed of faith began to grow, and prayer in bed at night became a ritual before I fell asleep. I had begun to “feel” something when I prayed -- an elation, a peace, I’m not sure what to call it – actually, a warm fuzzy feeling is pretty accurate. So each night I fell asleep praying for family members, friends, etc.

On November 18, 1970, I was following my routine of prayer, when an amazing incident occurred. When I describe the next few seconds (minutes?), I will relate it one thing at a time, but everything occurred simultaneously. I was as usual experiencing the warm fuzzies, but suddenly that feeling intensified and spread over my entire body. I immediately became aware of the fact that there was a “Presence” at the foot of the bed and I had the impression of “white.” (White robe? White light? I don’t know.) And the last impression was that the word JESUS was stamped (seared) into my mind across my forehead. As I said, this all happened at the same time.

My initial reaction was FEAR – a lot of it. What in the world had just happened? But as I mulled it over, my fear was replaced by a strange peace and amazingly, I drifted off to sleep. But my life had been changed forever; I would never be the same again.

To be continued.

SEARCHING FOR THE TRUTH (CONT’D)

The next step in my spiritual journey was when I was sixteen years old. I found a book of Mother’s lying around and began to read it. The book was entitled The Wall and was about the plight of Warsaw Jews during World War II. Essentially, the events that occurred in this book opened my eyes to the evil that existed in the world and I began to have my first real questions about God and His purposes.

My thoughts ran like this: if there is a God, how could He allow such horrible things to occur, especially to a group of people who were “His chosen”? These doubts continued to be present in my thoughts for many years. I remember once asking for an appointment with my minister to discuss some of my uncertainties, but for some reason, he kept putting me off, thus making me even more unsure. I finally sought advice from Mother’s former boss, a minister who worked for the denomination but didn’t actually pastor a church. He told me to pray about it, a suggestion I didn’t find particularly helpful; how could I pray when I didn’t believe in a God to pray to? So I continued to flounder in a sea of doubts for several years.

In my mid twenties I became interested in the supernatural world of the occult. I read a book about a man who by going into a trance could picture a person in his mind and could tell what was physically wrong with him/her. He would then describe a cure that usually involved some kind of natural solution. There were many testimonials written about him and his healing techniques. What got my attention was the fact that here was something that could happen outside of natural forces. To me that indicated the possibility, perhaps even probability, that there was some sort of higher power in charge, causing these supernatural events. So for several years I explored the concepts of these “new age” ideas, from healing to astrology to reincarnation and many types of “paranormal” experiences..

The importance of all this is that I began to believe in God, but I still had many questions that needed answers. I was not receiving any in the church I belonged to so began attending another one a little farther from our house. The children liked this much better and we all began to go on a regular basis.

The minister of this church was very likeable and we quickly became friends. I volunteered to help him with some secretarial work once a week and our friendship deepened. His influence on my spiritual beliefs gradually grew and I began to see that the “supernatural” existed within the Christian realm, as well. I admitted this to myself even though I didn’t really embrace orthodox Christian beliefs. I just couldn’t deny that prayers were being answered in this small church.

I began to pray seriously myself for the first time since I was a child. Tomorrow we shall see what the result was.

MY SEARCH FOR THE TRUTH

Several months ago I was writing about my spiritual journey in life and mentioned an incident that changed my life dramatically. I said at the time that if I reported it, it would be the “blog of all blogs.” Well, at the encouragement of a reader, and I hope inspiration from God, I am ready to write about it.

Actually, in thinking and praying about it, I’ve decided to divide it into at least three parts: 1) my search for the truth, 2) my encounter, and 3) the aftermath. Today I will begin at the beginning and see how far I get.

As most of you know, I was raised in a Christian home. Even though my parents went to two different churches and were never able to solve their differences in beliefs, we girls were “brought up in the church.” Unless we were sick, or out of town, we never missed going to Sunday school and church on Sunday mornings. Additionally, we attended vacation Bible school in the summers and any other special events held. Although we mostly went to and ultimately joined Mother’s church, we had plenty of occasions to attend Daddy’s church, as well. And we felt comfortable in both because we had friends at our church and many relatives at Daddy’s.

There came a time, and I’m not sure at what age, when I began to seek God on my own apart from my parents. I had a few meaningful moments as a child and in my early teens, but one significant event stands out. When I was fourteen, Billy Graham came to town and held a series of services in Vanderbilt football stadium. Interestingly enough, the ministers of both Daddy’s and Mother’s churches were opposed to his coming to Nashville. Our minister actually preached against it and tried to discourage us from hearing him because he was “too emotional” and whatever experience we had from it would be temporary.

But Mother and we girls went anyway to at least two meetings and maybe more. The one that I recall was “Youth Night,” and what I remember the most was that at the end of the sermon, I felt an unmistakable need, almost a compulsion, to “answer the call.” So even though it was very difficult, I went down those steps and prayed with the thousands of other teens who had also come forth.

At the time I was not at all sure what I had done; to my knowledge I had never been presented with “the plan of salvation through Jesus’ sacrifice” before. Certainly, our church leaders didn’t teach it and Daddy’s touched on it but added other things to it. Consequently, it may appear at first that the incident didn’t have much meaning, especially in view of my subsequent behavior for years afterward.

But I never forgot that feeling that “Something or Someone” outside of myself was trying to influence me that night.

To be continued . . .

MARRIED TO A PACK RAT

Another really great thing that is taking place during this re-do time is that closets are getting cleaned out and many items are being given away for tax purposes. So far I have had to have people come out for pickup four times, twice the ARC, and the Salvation Army the other two times. And while I am thrilled to get rid of all the clutter, it has thrown the genius into a panic.

All the family knows what the genius's father, Jimmie, was like --- he was the biggest pack rat of all time. First, he filled up their basement with his stuff; then the delightful screened in back porch that ran the entire width across the back of their house became crammed with all sorts of things. I remember that the seating area got smaller and smaller and was at last squeezed out. And finally, the little room off of the living room that was Jimmie's office eventually overflowed with still more items.

When the genius's parents moved out, there was the monumental task of sorting through and selling, giving, or throwing away all of the accumulated array of Jimmie's belongings. This job fell to the genius's sister and me. We had to be very careful when sifting through all of it because there were some hidden gems, (old coins, stamp collections, guns, old books, etc.) buried in all the piles of stuff. And we also had to be careful that Jimmie was not around because he wouldn't let anything go. But eventually, we got it done and moved on.

Over the years I have discovered that the apple didn't fall very far. The genius has been showing signs for years of having inherited the same tendencies. He still has every engineering and math book he used in college 50 years ago. And through the years has acquired many more. He now has five bookcases (big ones) in his little office upstairs along with six filing cabinets, all filled to the brim. And I won't even go into what our attic looks like. Let me just say that I'm sure we have every cancelled check that has been written since we married.

So you can understand his anxiety over my cleaning out closets. Everytime I do it, he asks in a shaky voice, "You didn't throw out anything of mine, did you?" And he usually goes through the stack of items for giving away. The only thing I really tried to give away that he balked about was a bookcase (what else?). Instead, he moved it into his room and made a "space" for it and of course filled it up to the brim. Where the books came from, I don't know. I have a sneaking suspicion he went to the attic and found some more!!

So let me go on record now to the rest of the family as to our possessions. I am trying my best to pare down, but I'm afraid I'm fighting a losing battle. I guess you will have to get one of those rented dumpsters out to clean this place out.

But I want you to know that I have tried to keep it under control.

OUR REMARKABLE SON

If there's one thing I have learned throughout this house redoing stuff it is how amazing our son Jim IV is. I just didn't know how talented he is in the role of handyman. And he'll tackle anything!! It's been a real pleasure watching him work and figure things out.

For instance, I bought two sets of wireless headphones for the TV, got instructions from the salespeople at Electronic Express, and came home prepared to get them to work. I couldn't even get one set to work. So I asked the genius to help, and he couldn't do it either. Then I called on Jay, our 11 year old genius grandson, and he almost did it, but not quite. Then Jim IV came on the scene.

He was able to get one set working right away but had to think about the double set. Eventually, he got both working, rigged up a place on the back of the TV to hang the headphones, and taped all the wires so that they don't show from the front.

And what a fast worker he is!! He can get more done in an an hour than I can imagine mainly because he has all the right tools. I've never seen such an array. When he's not sure about how to do something, he reads up on it thoroughly and then dives right in. And the finished product is great!!!

I had no idea he was so clever. I knew he was intelligent like the genius but had no clue he could do this sort of work. Knowing he didn't learn this from his father, who hates doing any kind of handyman jobs, I asked him where he gained this knowledge. He said he taught himself over the years.

Since we've lived in the same town for most of his life minus his college years, I had to ask myself why I didn't know this about him! I think the answer is that he is modest about himself and just never thought to show off his work. I have found out that he did and does numerous odd jobs around his house and I just assumed they had hired someone to do it. WRONG!! He's an expert and I'm convinced he could make a living doing it if he so desired.

But he doesn't; his first love is tennis and that's what he will be doing from now on.

But I'm truly grateful to know whom to call on when I need help!!!

MORE PICTURES

The first two are opposite sides of the formerly "dead space" we had between the living and dining areas of our great room, and the next three are pictures of the new downstairs bedroom.

IMAGINATION RUNS AMOK

I think it is time to revisit the Obits! From time to time I have jotted down some info I have gleaned from daily reading this section. Most of it just sets my active imagination hopping even more than usual.

First, there is the subject of nicknames. I noticed that an elderly woman had passed on who had the interesting nickname of "Onion." Where in the world would that come from? Did she like onions? Did someone see her peeling one and crying? I was intrigued, to say the least. Then I noticed that her "real" name was Vivian and I could just see some little grandchild trying to say that and having it sound like "Onion." So that could explain the unusual moniker.

Another one was called "Doll Baby." That one I could visualize for a woman who called everyone else that and so people in return stuck the name on her. We had a friend in the Army who was like that. He called everyone "Charlie" so naturally the name "Charlie" was given to him.

But what about "Q Ball"? Was this a man who liked to play pool and so was thus named after one of the balls? And how about the interesting spelling of it?

There was a nickname I noticed the other day that was given to an elderly man: "Rail Head"! What's up with that? Maybe he worked for the railroad, or just liked trains. Or it could be a haircut he had at one time. I guess we'll never know.

I've also been intrigued by given names. One man had a last name of Fudge. My mind went crazy over that one, and I decided it would have been great if he had been a judge. No one could have been serious in his court room when he made his entrance and they called out "All rise for Judge Fudge."

But the last one is great and so help me, it's true. I noticed that one of the pallbearers listed in the paper for a funeral was actually named Arch Bishop. What were his parents thinking?!?

So you can see what my life has been reduced to: getting my kicks reading the Obituaries. But I'm still not in there and that's a good thing!!

I thought you might like to see the historical bench in its new place. I also tried to include the two tables and the portrait of Anelka (paternal grandmother of the genius).

I'm almost ready to begin making photos of the rest of the new arrangements, but I'm waiting to hang pictures, etc. When the finishing touches are in place, I will snap some and publish.

ONE THING LEADS TO ANOTHER

I've always observed that when you start one project around the house, big or small, it always seems to lead to another ... and another ... etc. I'm certainly finding that to be true this time around.

The other night the genius asked me why I was changing the furniture around so much. It was difficult to come up with an answer that wouldn't cause hurt feelings. I guess I could have said that I have helping me a male who is young and not worried about hurting his back, and that he is -- ahem! -- patient. Jim IV is so kind that he didn't utter a word of protest when I asked him to move something and then liked it better the original way.

And also sometimes I get ideas about what would look better when I add to or change an area. That happened when I put the two new TV watching chairs on a wall and I thought things would look better if I moved the china cabinet from said wall. So I took everything out of it, Jim IV moved it to the opposite corner, and I washed the stuff and put it all back in. I had had an old artificial ficus plant there and because I hated having anything artificial, have long wanted to be rid of it. So that was settled.

On the other hand, the genius had not liked a big basket that I kept magazines in so I took it out of the living area and took the beautiful large brass planter that had held the plant, filled it with books and magazines in place of the basket. Also, I took twinkle lights I had had on the plant and put a string throughout the inside of the china cabinet to make the glassware shine. Now everyone is happy.

One really funny thing: the genius is threatening to "plant" the artificial ficus tree because it looks so good by the garbage can where we placed it temporarily.

Do you see what I mean? One thing just leads to another!!

STUCK IN THE SEVENTIES

Our house was built in the 70s right during the time when brightly colored bathroom fixtures were popular. The former owner had "redecorated" the two upstairs bathrooms by glazing or painting the tubs and/or the vanities. Of course, what happened was that the paint began to peel off and look awful.

Once before I called out a bath fixing company to see what could be done. The salesman came out, took measurements, and showed us ways to cover up our tubs and walls. I just wasn't pleased with what he showed us and decided against it. However, when we began this redecorating project I decided to revisit the issue.

I went through the process of calling several companies and chose one that would meet with just me. The others wanted to have both the genius and me here, and I wanted to be able to explore what they had on my own without worrying about the questions he was sure to ask, etc. This time I liked what I saw, even though it was a bit more expensive than I expected.

Today I had the salesman back out again and after some wheeling and dealing I signed up for it. I'm really excited about what I picked out and what it will look like. The salesman took pictures and said it was the worst case of peeling he had ever seen. I wonder if they will put the before and after pictures on their website.

Who knows? Maybe I'll take some and put them on the blog!!

BACK TO WORK

Well, I guess it's a work day today; I assume that Jim IV and Jay are back in town from their skiing trip and that the former is ready to get started again. Of course, I was busy yesterday getting ready for the events that are happening today.

First, I moved the old antique upholstered bench from the "dead" area of the living/dining room to under the front window. Like many of our pieces of furniture, this bench has a history:

The genius's grandfather was a bachelor until he was 43 years old, whereupon he married a 19 year old girl named Brenda Bailey (for whom our daughter Brenda and grandaughter Bailey are named). He owned a clothing store in Bowling Green, Kentucky, in the late 1900's, in which sat our upholstered bench with a tall upright floor mirror to match. Both pieces have beautifully carved wood with inlays in them. I can just imagine the women in bustles and corsets that must have sat on this bench while their husbands tried out their clothes in front of the mirror, or vise-versa.

For years these two pieces abided in the living room of the genius's parents. When
they moved into an apartment in their later years, we took the bench and his sister took the mirror. We have enjoyed that stately piece ever since.

Today the two chairs and ottoman that will sit where the bench was are being delivered. I guess that space will be dead no more because we will now use it to watch TV. (The new TV stand will also make its appearance today.) And the good news is that I will be able to watch TV while I am in the kitchen!

So there are many changes going on here. The downstairs bedroom is almost complete, the TV area will be finished today, and we have a little more seating space in the "living" area of the living room, all grouped around the fireplace.

Then it will be onwards and upwards to the second floor!!

I took a short break from all the work going on around here to go to bridge club today. I didn't win --- but I didn't lose either; I didn't play at all because I was the hostess. I elected to have it meet at the University Club in one of the private rooms instead of in our home because of lack of space both inside and also outside for the parking .

Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves; in fact, I may have started a new trend. Several people said that they wanted to have it at their club or even at mine and let them pay for it. I must say the chef did a very nice job of having plenty of food and coffee, etc. to start with and then served up a good lunch as well. And it was certainly a lot easier for me not having to fix all the food.

The genius and I enjoyed a good meal Friday night in the lounge at the club with two other couples. One couple we see on a regular basis but the other twosome not so often. During the night I looked at the female half of that couple and noticed something different about her. At first I thought she had lost weight, then I decided she had on a top that didn't fit her very well; it was a little loose. All of this just flashed through my mind but I didn't think anymore about it.

As we were leaving, she told the other lady and me that over the holidays she had had a breast reduction. I have never been able to understand the problem of having too much, but it was interesting to listen to her experience. And she feels much better now -- her shoulders and upper back don't hurt anymore. It made me wonder about Dolly Parton and how she handles that.

Ah well, that's a decision I'll never have to make!!

Jim IV and Jay have gone to North Carolina for a three day skiing trip, so I guess the work will begin again on Wednesday.

Meanwhile, I think I will kick back tomorrow and take a much needed rest!!

STILL GETTING ORDERED HOUSE

Jim IV and I are certainly getting a ton done in "this old house." So far here's what we've done:

1) painted the downstairs bathroom

2) painted the downstairs den-turned-bedroom

3) shampooed carpet in new bedroom

4) sanded and painted the bed to go in there

5) moved said bed to the new bedroom

6) cleaned out bookcases and given away over 100 books

7) called the Salvation Army out twice to give away all unnecessary items

8) moved twin beds into the master bedroom, bought new mattress and springs for the one that didn't have any

9) moved kingsized bed into other upstairs bedroom.

10) got estimate for new bath and shower in the master bath (yikes!)

11) picked out two chairs and ottoman plus TV stand for the living room and hopefully we will buy them today.

Whew!!! I think that's all so far.

What we have left to do is get the bathroom done, get chair in the living room re-upholstered, put bed together, move the rest of the furniture around, and hang curtains for two bedrooms.

On the back burner for now is to buy bedspreads and curtains for the master bedroom.

Then when pretty weather comes, we'll start outside on the yard.

Just makes "this old house" tired to see what all we've done!!

GETTING OUR HOUSE IN ORDER

Yikes!!!! Here it is Thursday night and I've only written one blog this week. That's a good way to lose readers fast. Jim IV and I are working hard to get everything done, but we have lots more to do.

What we've done so far is to get the downstairs bathroom painted and are almost finished doing the same with the adjoining den, which we are turning into a bedroom. We've had to hit Home Depot several times and are doing our best to see that they stay in business. We are changing furniture around, cleaning out closets, calling out Salvation Army to pick up our castoffs, etc., etc.

We still have to take a sofa and recliner out to Brenda's in Franklin, then pick up two twin beds BJ and I slept in as children (Brenda has been storing them for us in her attic). Those will go in the master bedroom on the second floor, and the bed in there will go into the other room we use as a bedroom upstairs.

(In reading over the above, I noticed that I used the first person plural in describing the work, making it seem that I am doing half of it. Not so; Jim IV is doing most of it, while I am cheering him on.)

Then I plan to refinish the bed we are moving into the downstairs bedroom after we finish the painting in there. I have made plans, shopped accordingly, and then changed my mind several times. But I am happy as a lark, getting my nest in order.

Of course, the genius is a little concerned about the many bills we are running up, so I have to slow down on the purchases for a while. But he seems pleased with the changes also.

The major change we will have is that the big screen will be in the large area of space between the living and dining areas of our big front room. We will buy two comfortable chairs for viewing, but the big drawback is that when the kids want to watch TV, we will be in the living area and will be disturbed by the noise. The answer I have found for that is to buy wireless headphones so the sound will be muted. Or they can go upstairs to one of the bedrooms to watch.

After all is said and done, we should have plenty of room to bed down folks when they visit. That's what started all the work in the first place.

But meanwhile, the place is a mess, so if you come before we're finished, you may not find a bed available.

WINTER IN NASHVILLE

I'm afraid I'm getting a little erratic about writing these days. I've been working too hard around the house to get much else done. When Jim IV gets here early each morning, we get started and go all day.

It's a good thing I have plenty to do inside because I'm surely not going to go out in the weather we've been having. It has been cloudy and cold (a typical winter day in Nashville) and today it's pourihg rain to boot.

People who live outside the South make fun of us when we say it's cold. But believe me, with the humidity the way it is down here it feels much colder than it is. And when that wind comes barreling in from the North, it cuts right through anything you have on in the way of clothing.

In order for me to stay warm during these cold days I have to put on hose, socks, jeans and boots on the bottom half of my body. And on the top I have to have a tight camisole, turtleneck shirt, and sweater or sweatshirt, etc. I know I sound like a wimp, but if I don't dress that way, I get chilled, especially if I have to walk the dogs several times a day. Then I add coat, scarf, gloves, and sometimes a hat.

I remember one of the coldest winters I ever spent was in Gainesville, Florida. The people in that part of the state ignore the fact that it gets cold in the winter and the house where we lived had inadequate heating. There was a big propane heater in the hall and that was it. I was always afraid that it was a fire hazard, in the first place, and it didn't come close to heating the entire house. Thank goodness, the winters were short, really only about 2 months.

I will say one thing about Nashville winters though. Sometimes we have a day where the temperature reaches into the 60's or even 70's. And we really enjoy those days, but then it's back to business as usual, freezing days and nights.

It got down to five degrees a week or two ago and that's when we have to be really careful. We have to leave the water dripping in the kitchen and bathrooms or we could have a mess on our hands. We learned that the hard way in our last house with broken pipes several times. Doing without water when it's freezing outside is no fun, believe me.

For now, I'll just keep busy on the house and try not to keep thinking about how I could be in Arizona where it's nice and warm.

GETTING THINGS DONE, AND HOW!!

I'm a very happy camper right now. I have an almost full time handyman getting things done that have been put off for years. Don't get me wrong; the genius has many fabulous qualities, but doing major projects around the house is not one of them. He doesn't like doing them so they often tend to get put on the back burner, and as a result, a few jobs have stacked up around the house.

Now with Jim IV to help out for a few weeks, I am scurrying around finding all sorts of things for him to do. Right now the living room is full of items to go to the Salvation Army as soon as I get them added up for tax purposes. So our living arrangements will be a little cramped for a while.

One of the best things about working with my own son is that we are very compatible, so it is pleasant spending so much time together. And I don't know why but it seems like when the genius and I work together we can't agree on how to do each project. But Jim IV and I are doing just fine.

The genius likes all this too because 1) he doen't have to do them, and 2) they get done anyway, and 3) my nagging will stop (at least for a while).

Of course, there was a time when I did all this myself. In our old house I painted all the rooms at least once and several more than once. I cleaned out closets regularly and hauled all kinds of stuff up and down stairs. I even moved the furniture around by myself.

But those days are long gone what with my arthritic back, knees, and hips. So it's nice to tell someone that I need this piece moved here, or that carried there, etc.

The only "downside" is that my days of lounging around all day are over. I find myself working much harder than I've been used to.

But, as I keep telling myself as I fall into bed at night exhausted, "A LITTLE WORK NEVER HURTS ANYONE!"

A DAY IN THE LIFE OF RUFUS
(As Told by Rufus)

This morning I awoke at 5:45 ready to get up and start my day. I first began to wiggle a little to see how Y’mommy would react. All I got was a moan. So I began to stretch and lick myself hoping the movement would wake her up more fully. I knew Y’daddy was already awake and I NEEDED to go OUT!

My stirring around worked; she got up, picked me up and took me into Y’daddy’s study where he was working hard on his preps. At least HE was glad to see me. He said to Y’mommy, “You look grouchy.” She ALWAYS looks grouchy in the mornings. Anyway, he took me outside for my morning’s business and I felt much better.

I grabbed my Greenie and ran back upstairs to eat it on Y’mommy’s bed just so she won’t get her feelings hurt that I wanted to leave her. Then when I finished I returned to the kitchen to eat my breakfast. At first I thought Y’daddy was already gone, so I howled my disapproval, but he appeared and calmed me down with some turkey meat leftover from Christmas.

Again I snatched my after-breakfast bone and raced back to be with Y’mommy. This time she actually awoke enough to try to grab my bone away, but as usual I was too quick. Only after “the morning routine” was I able to settle back down while she finished her nap.

This morning turned out to be a better day than usual because Jesse came to spend the day. After we romped around the rooms and chased each other all over the downstairs, we were both ready for our walk.

I love my walk because I love to sniff along the side of the street to see who has been visiting our street. First, I buried my face in a pile of leaves to smell where Hulk had been; then, I definitely found a spot where Mr. Fox had been last night. Finally, I discovered that that black dog from the other street had passed by and left his markings. None of this suited my fancy to leave my own scent.

Jesse, meanwhile, likes to trot down the street occasionally leaving her own mark, and Y’mommy is caught in the middle of us, me dawdling and Jesse hurrying along, with her arms stretched out each holding a leash. Finally, she reminds me that I have a treat waiting for me if I would only get down to business, so I reluctantly finish and turn around to go back.

Then Jesse and I could get down to the real business of the day, alternately guarding the house and napping.

NEVER TOO OLD TO CHANGE

We're have a nice holiday here with snow pouring down outside while we are snuggling up inside. Both dogs are sitting on my lap while I'm writing this (Jessie is trying to lick my hand) and I am making innumerable errors trying to type. So far it is sticking only to the grass, but if this keeps up, we could have a real snow. I always like one good one a year and then I'm done.

I've had a change of plans for my winter months. I was going to Phoenix for several weeks in February, but I'm going to postpone the trip until May when two of our grandkids are graduating (again!). Jordan will get her degree from Grand Canyon University in nursing while Tom will get his Masters in Electrical Engineering. There were several reasons for the postponement.

One is that Ashley's father-in-law had heart surgery in California and Mike, her husband has been there for over a week helping out. It looks as if he will be spending quite a bit of time there over the next few months. So my visit would only complicate matters.

Another is that Jim IV has signed a contract to be the tennis pro at a local country club and is waiting for that job to begin in March. So he is available to help the genius and me get some major things accomplished around the house. And I really need to be here for that. So my plans have changed, but I am looking forward to getting this place in shape here.

We are all happy for Jim's switch in jobs; he's always loved tennis and excelled at teaching. The club where he will be is about a mile from his house, so things just couldn't have worked out any better for him.

And meanwhile, I will have a great handyman for a while!!

MY BUSY WEEK

This is my full week that I wrote about a few blogs ago, and so far it is going well.

Monday was bridge club and I was back in the winners' column after finishing at the bottom last month. My partner and I tied for first place this time. I had a delightful time and I also discovered another woman who is interested in pistol target shooting. So we took each other's phone numbers and we'll see if anything comes of it.

Tuesday was my coffee at a church friend's house. I arrived at 9:35, thinking I was five minutes late and realized I was early since there were no cars. So I just sat in the car for a while talking on the phone to BJ. I had gotten the time wrong, of course -- it started at 10:00, but I had a great time talking to old friends and meeting new faces also.

Yesterday I went shopping and got my hair cut, so today is the first day I am spending at home. It is verrrrry cold outside and I don't look forward to walking the dogs. But tonight it is supposed to get down to 5 degrees; I definitely don't look forward to that. Makes me want to go on to Phoenix now!!

Just took a break to walk the dogs because Rufus was making signs he couldn't wait. I was so bundled up that I was actually starting to break a sweat --- until I stepped outside. Rufus and Jesse didn't like the cold either; they did their business quickly and came back in, thank goodness. I looked at the thermometer and it was 17!! For Nashville that is COLD!!

Tomorrow is Burro Babes day and that's worth braving single digit temperatures!!!

BLOG STATS

I've been writing this blog now about a year and a half and have enjoyed it immensely. I have a way to look on Google Analytics and tell how many people are reading the blog and where they are reading it from. Today I want to report on what the numbers are.

Most of my readers come from the Nashville area, and that it to be expected since most of my family lives here. The other big numbers area is in and around Phoenix, where my daughter and family live. That too is understandable. The surprise has been that apparently I have some people who check in regularly from different parts of the country.

One is in California. Right now West Hollywood is currently number three on the list of places who have opened the blog for the past month. I thought for a while that this was my son-in-law's father because they live in that area, but he didn't even know I was writing a blog. So it must be someone who just happened onto the column one day and stayed. Whoever it is is certainly welcome especially since he/she has been a visitor now for some months.

Another one is Knoxville, and I assumed that was MA, my sister. But then I see Crab Orchard on there and know that is her address. So I don't know who Knoxville is. Others who regularly show up are Antioch, Tennessee, and Grayson, Georgia. I'm sure that Grayson are my friends Larry and Betty, but I have no idea who Antioch is.

And of course, there are the one hit wonders (or maybe I should say wanders), the ones who are just passing through. I get those from all over the world. They just happen into the blog, don't like what they see and keep going never to return. Or maybe they do, I've had three hits from a city in the Philippines. And Manchester, England has visited a few times. In the last month, I have had visits from five different countries, most of them in the U.S. of course. The total visits have been 235 for the last 30 days.

Maybe I should start marketing the blog and see if I can make some money out of this space. I'M KIDDING!!! That's the last thing I would want to do, bring pressure on myself to get a blog out on a regular basis. No, I think I'll keep writing for pleasure and hope that everyone who reads it will get a laugh or two or get a whiff of what life in the South is like.

Or what life is like for an old grandmother of eight!!

AND THEN THERE WAS ONE

I've been thinking about friendships and how important they have been in my own life. There have been many people, both male and female, who have been very meaningful to me throughout the years. Some I still have, but I especially remember three friends I had in my twenties on into my forties: Sylvia, Terry, and Julie.

The four of us met in our mid twenties and all of us had a connection of some kind to each other. Three of us had husbands who worked for IBM; a different three had boys the same age who played together once a week. Sylvia, Julie, and I played tennis together, while Terry and her husband attended the same church the genius and I did. We were all about the same ages and we all played bridge together in a group with our spouses. We spent many happy hours together, sometimes taking vacations, other times just visiting with each other.

The first thing that happened to splinter our little group was that Terry and her husband moved to a town about 2 hours away. The genius and I still kept in touch with them, traveling up to see them often or vise-versa. Several times Sylvia and I went to stay with Terry and played in a tennis tournament held in a nearby town. We still had many happy times together, just not as frequently.

Then Sylvia and her husband began to have troubles and eventually they separated and divorced. She moved away to pursue a career in nursing and the genius and I lost touch with both of them, much to our sorrow.

About the same time as all this was taking place, Julie became lost while driving home one day. She was eventually diagnosed with a brain tumor and her prognosis was bleak. Sylvia, who had finished her degree and had moved back to town, helped care for Julie until her death.

As the years went by, Sylvia moved to Florida and about five years ago I read in the paper that she too had died. The genius and I attended her memorial service where we saw Terry and her husband. We had still kept in touch but our paths had gone in different directions and we rarely saw each other.

A few weeks ago the genius and I drove to Terry's small town to attend the visitation with her family; she, too, had passed on.

It's a strange feeling to be the last one left; I can't really describe it. I'm sad about the losses, of course, and the end of happy times. But I can't help but be realistic about my situation either: I'm almost seventy and the grim reaper could be close. (Of course, any of us could go at any time.)

Still, it's very sobering to dwell on these things, but since there's not a thing I can do about it, I will just enjoy whatever time I have left.

And keep writing my blog!!

SOUTHEASTERN CONFERENCE VS. THE REST OF THE WORLD

It's a great day here at our house. The Gators did it again. It wasn't pretty, but hey! we're satisfied to be the national champs for the second time in three years. We had a wonderful time watching Superman and his teammates hold on and win!!

I guess I'll get out the car flags today when I go out. Might as well show my colors to the world, even though I run the risk of car damage with all the U. of Tennessee fans around. Surely not!! They've got to be happy that the SEC held up so well in the bowl games. Final record was SEC 8 wins and 2 losses.

Oklahoma was a good team -- they had a very precise passer as a quarterback -- but let's face it; the Big 12 just doesn't have the depth of the SEC and that's why they were able to come into this game with such a high scoring average. The SEC teams, on the other hand, beat each other up week after week and the scores are lower.

A great case in point is Ole Miss (the announcer, obviously not a Southerner, actually called them "Old Miss" last night). They had some losses (one to Vandy) but they beat Florida and then in the Cotton Bowl beat Texas Tech, a highly touted team. We just don't get the respect here in the South we deserve.

Oh, I know; most of the South is conservative and the media is not. But records tell the story and it's an accurate story. So, I hope the news people will come around. But I won't hold my breath!!

So, how do you all like this soap box, dear Readers? Some of you are not interested in football at all, and I promise not to belabor the point.

BUT WHAT WILL THE GENIUS AND I DO ON SATURDAYS FOR THE NEXT EIGHT MONTHS??!

THE TEMPORARY STATE OF CLEANLINESS

Ahhhhh, a nice clean carpet!! Whoever thought that putting in ivory colored carpets would be a good thing must have been off his rocker! Or it could be that they weren't going to live on it, just put it in to sell the house. It was new when we moved in 14 years ago, and it lasted all of a few weeks in that pristine condition. And then later Rufus came on the scene and you can imagine what kind of state it is in now.

I have fought the battle with sprays especially made to "remove" dog stains until my hand is limp from pushing that button. I even purchased a rug shampooer and keep it out to go over the spots as they occur. Today I had the professionals in and it looks great -- for now. Until the genius tracks in leaves and mud, or until Rufus does his thing. And he will; the only way to keep him from ruining this rug is to move.

Maybe a better way would be to put in hardwood floors. That's certainly something I'm going to investigate in the next few months (I have to hurry before the genius retires). I'm tired of fighting it!! And besides, putting in new floors would be much less trouble than moving.

On another subject, have you ever noticed that certain things seem to occur at one time? I sit at home for weeks at a time, even on the weekends, and don't go anywhere. Just listen to my schedule next week:

On Monday I play bridge, Tuesday attend a coffee at a friend's house, and Friday have lunch with the Burro Babes (my high school classmates). Then the next weekend we have parties on two consecutive nights after being idle for several weeks. Why does it always happen that like that? I'll be exhausted!!

I can hear my sister MA chuckling as she reads this. She does this every week!!

DREARY DAY THOUGHTS

Oh, what a wet, rainy day it is here; it has been raining steadily since yesterday morning. I had visions of going to Walmart today to grocery shop (Annie and I ran out of time yesterday), but that has been put on the back burner. I'll just have to use regular milk for the cornbread for supper instead of buttermilk. Just can't see getting out in this stuff.

On the real back burner of my stove top is that good old Southern favorite, a pot of white beans, simmering away. I hate to do this to the genius because he is on a diet and can't eat bread, but he is being very brave about it. He loves the beans so much that he told me to fix it anyway. Obviously, I can't eat a whole pan of cornbread, so I'll have to have something to go with it again tomorrow night.

Jim IV and the genius are in a contest to see who can lose the most weight by April 1. This little challenge will spur them both on because I don't know anyone more competitive than those two. The winner will treat the other one to a "blow it all out" dinner, and thus negate three months of dieting! I'll be in Phoenix for three and a half weeks during part of this starving process so will miss out on any moans and groans about hunger pains, etc. Oh, darn!!

And speaking of Phoenix, or more specifically Glendale, what a great game that was last night between Texas and Ohio State. I was pulling for Texas all the way because I believe that the Big 10 is so overrated, but that was an exciting finish. Now on to the REALLY important game, Florida vs. Oklahoma. The genius and I have waited for this one all year!! I hope we can pull another one out for the SEC whose current bowl record is 7 and 2.

And then we will begin the long dry spell of waiting for the 2009 season to begin!!

THE END OF A GOOD YEAR

Soooo, I took a little vacation from the blog. With the genius home, and me scuttling around trying to keep him busy with "house stuff," I decided to take a break from writing. But now I'm back with itchy fingers.

Today Annie is spending the day with me (she doesn't go back to school until tomorrow) and we will take time for some pampering. The nails place is calling to us for some attention to our fingers and toes, so we will do that first. Then it's on to Walmart (my new best friend for groceries).

I also need to go to PetSmart for a doggie backpack for me and Rufus. I plan to use that to take him on the plane to Phoenix in February and I want him to get used to it first. That should be an interesting experiment, his being bundled up on my back like that. I'm sure he won't like it at first, and maybe not ever, but he will have to do it anyway.

We had a great New Year's Eve celebration with the sisters and husbands in Fairfield Glade this year. The "girls" all went shopping during the day while the men worked out and/or watched football. Since we were so close to the Eastern Time Zone we celebrated at midnight their time instead of ours so we could go on to bed. (I don't know what our excuse will be next year when we are back in Nashville!)

MA fixed us an excellent lunch on New Year's Day of pork roast, turnip greens (freshly picked and frozen last summer), black eyed peas (of course! You have to eat at least one for each month of the new year, but we all ate lots more than that!), BJ's sweet potato and corn casseroles and her delicious cornbread. There was red velvet cake and boiled custard for dessert.

You may wonder what my contribution was to this wonderful feast. I was the drink fixer, the dish washer, and general flunky. I know better than to try to compete with my sisters in the cooking department. And oh yes, I bought the roast.

We had a great time, but maybe not as good as the Phoenix side of the family who were vacationing in Hawaii at the time!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OF YOU!!!!

WHAT IS THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT?

When I became a Christian about thirty-eight years ago, a strange feeling came upon mne. I began to dislike Christmas and all the busy-ness that went with it. I wanted to concentrate on the spiritual side of the holidays and somehow couldn't because of all the activities that went with them.

I had so much more to do then than I do now: shopping for tons of people, baking all types of goodies to give as gifts, sending out Christmas cards, picking out and decorating the tree, decorating the rest of the house, wrapping presents, going to tons of parties and on and on. No matter how hard I tried to get that mysterious undefinable feeling that is called the Christmas spirit back, I just couldn't and haven't for a long time.

Over the years I just learned to accept it and somehow get through all the tasks, occasionally experiencing little glimpses of the magic I used to associate with Chrstmas. I still collected my manger scenes and enjoyed setting them out each year.

This year is different, however, and I don't know why. Maybe it was the rest in Florida for a month, maybe it's because my life is not as hectic. Whatever it is, I'm enjoying it thoroughly. I brought out my manger scenes and the little artificial fiber optic Christmas trees and stuck them in the front windows, both upstairs and down. I adorned the front porch and three holly bushes in front of the house with lots and lots of tiny colored lights. And I turned on the white lights that stay year round on the ficus tree in the dining room.

I wouldn't say that I've gone all out in decorating, but it's just enough to suit me. Tomorrow (the 23rd) is going to be my day for cooking. I'm cooking a turkey, then cutting it off of the bone and putting it in chicken stock to store in the refrig. Then all I have to do is heat it up and make the gravy. I'll make all the other stuff, dressing, squash casserole, bread and have it all ready to heat'n'serve Christmas Eve night, when the Nashville family all gathers at our house. (Because of my recent battle with oysters, I'm ommiting the scalloped oysters this year.) Brenda and Laurie will bring two other dishes each.

So once again we will be well fed and excited to open presents after dinner. And I won't be so tired from spending all day in the kitchen; I can really enjoy the gift openings.

To all my readers out there, I hope you all have a very merry Christmas, and will truly enjoy it. Maybe we will even turn off all the lights except for the Christmas ones and play inspiring music.

Actually, that will probably have to occur on Christmas night when everyone is gone. I can't see the grandchildren getting into that scene!

BAD COLDS

When I came home from Florida the latter part of November, the genius had been in the middle of a bad cold. I was very compassionate and tried to be patient when he moaned and groaned. Then just about the time he was getting over that, he came down with a fresh cold and cough. (Of course that's what happens when you burn the candle at both ends.)

Still, I tried to commiserate with him and to be as sympathetic as I could. I pampered him with delicious hot meals. In fact, I believe I could have gotten a good angel award for my admirable behavior.

Thursday afternoon I began to feel somewhat under the weather myself -- my throat began to itch, my chest felt tight, and the sneezes started. I was not a happy camper, to say the least.

After a sleepless night of coughing, I was not feeling too hot Friday morning, but I was trying to be my happy cheerful self. As we were driving out in the car that morning, a little moan escaped from my lips, and he snarled, "Oh boy, I can see that this is going to be a great weekend."

I said, Wait a minute!! Hold on!!! I'm not allowed to say I feel bad when I have a cold??? I have listened to you for weeks about how bad you felt and how hard it was to keep going, etc., etc., etc. I've tried my best to be a good wife to you while you were trudging through the mess, and you have the gall to growl at me because I groaned a little???

Actually, I didn't say all that, just a short version of it. But I got my point across. Ever since then he has been very sweet and helpful. But I sincerely hope that we will get back to good health soon.

It's definitely not fun to be sick anytime, but especially at Christmas!!!!

ALL TIME FAVORITE BOOKS

Every now and then I come across a passage out of a book I'm reading and I'm captivated with the message, the way it is written, and how it hits me where I live. The following quote from The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield is an example of what I'm talking about.

There is something about words. In expert hands, maniputated deftly, they take you prisoner. Wind themselves around your limbs like spider silk, and you are so enthralled you cannot move, they pierce your skin, enter your blood, numb your thoughts. Inside you they work their magic.

This one paragraph describes how I feel so many times when I'm reading the Scriptures, for instance. The words indeed "work their magic" in me as I ponder what I've just read. And what better hands could the words be manipulated by than the Spirit of God? No wonder the Bible is still the #1 bestseller!

But I also feel this way when I read an excellent novel. I get so caught up in reading it that I think about it while I go about my business during the day and when I'm falling asleep at night. Sometimes I even dream about certain aspects of the book.

If I'm really taken with the author, I will try to get all the books he/she has written and read them all. And these I don't rush through so I can savor the experience for as long as possible. I'm doing that very thing now with James Herriot, the Yorkshire vet who wrote hilariously about his adventures treating animals. I recently ordered five of his books and started at the beginning (All Creatures Great and Small). I'm taking my time going through it so I can admire and appreciate his "way with words." He was a genius at using just enough exaggeration of an incident to make it really funny.

I think it would be interesting to hear from readers about what books have given you the most enjoyment over the years. Like we did with movies. And it doesn't have to be just fiction.

I'll go first: my favorite all time book is Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand, which I read the first time in 1960 when I was 21.

Let's see how you do with this assignment!!

LEARNING TO BE A HOUSEWIFE

When I was in Florida during the month of November, I had plenty of opportunities to work in the kitchen. Sometimes it was cleaning up after one of the sisters had cooked, sometimes I did the cooking myself. But the most interesting times for me were when all three of us sisters were cooking at the same time.

We all have different styles and ideas about cooking and we are all pretty strong minded women. So, while we all tolerated each other extremely well, it was obvious at least to me that this was just another area in which we are different.

BJ and MA are more alike in their "kitchen views" but they cook most of their meals at home whereas the genius and I are likely to eat out several times a week. Both sisters are excellent cooks, but at the same time, they are very smart shoppers, buying sale items, etc. Also, they don't waste a thing, saving leftovers, recycling ziplock backs, and washing and reusing disposable cups. Everything they do in the kitchen is designed to be tasty and healthy and doing so with the least expenditure.

And then I step into the picture. My cooking philosophy is to make the food taste as delicious as I can and I do it lavishly. My grocery basket is always filled with real butter, real cream, meats straight from the butcher, extra thick paper towels, and nothing low fat. (The other day we ran out of butter at home and the genius asked me if I had any other "spreads" in the refrigerator. I said, "Absolutely not!") So my grocery bill is always higher than theirs.

After 48 years of cooking for the genius, I have also learned to make plenty of whatever I'm making. That's another way I am different from my sisters. BJ and MA tend to cut back on the servings for their husbands because they don't "need" it, while my feeling is to give them as much as they want. Chun laughingly says that MA is "always telling me what I need!" If I don't give the genius as much as he wants he just goes to the pantry and eats something else in addition to the meal.

Well, I am happy to report that I learned something from them while watching them cook in Florida. For one thing, I save the leftovers and have them for lunch the next day. Also, I have begun to buy my groceries from Walmart and am saving a bundle. And I'm cooking more and eating out less. And best of all, I finally learned from BJ how to whip up good cornbread. I've probably cooked it 4 or 5 times since I've been back. The genius loves all these changes!

I may yet become a good house frau!!

CHANGES, CHANGES

Whew!!! I finally get a day to myself at home. It's been a busy weekend and yesterday was a day of going to the doctor and later picking up grandchildren. So today is definitely braless and at home (sorry, Tsquared, for the mental image).

Today is also math exam day for the genius, so I definitely won't see much of him. He will be grading, calculating grades, and writing comments to each set of parents for the rest of the week. THEN, we can relax and enjoy the holidays while he has a little spare time. We get somewhat of a preview of what it will be like when he retires (if he ever does!).

Life is full of adjustments. First, I had a very busy career as a mother for twenty some odd years, then I had to adjust to a life of balancing school and tennis, then on to 18 years of teaching. Adjusting to retirement when my life suddenly became slower and more peaceful was not difficult. What I wonder is if I can as easily get used to having the genius around full time. I've become somewhat accustomed to keeping my own schedule so I'm sure there will be some compromises for both of us. But my adjustment will be nothing compared to his. To stop working after so many years of putting in 16-18 hour days will be quite a change for him!

And speaking of changes, my body has had some interesting temperature shifts over the years. First, as a child and most of my adult life, I was freezing all the time except in the heat of summer. Then I began to be hotter natured than almost everyone around me, which I attributed to women problems and the gaining of weight. Then in September, when I stopped drinking, an amazing phenomenom occurred. I am now back to being cold again. I've had to raise the temp in the house and also put on layers of clothes to keep warm this winter. It's amazing that alcohol and the lack of it could make such a difference.

I would go back to Florida this winter, but instead I have opted for a month in Phoenix where I can be with my family.

Besides, IT'S FREE!

NOw I KNOW HOW TO RELAX!!

Now that I've retired my days are divided into two different types: bra and bra-less. I know, I know, that's more than you wanted to know about a grandmother of eight, but I'm spilling the beans anyway (no pun intended).

It's great to kick back when I'm at home and not to be "bound up" all day; I just never realized how much freedom I would feel in this little state of "undress," but I recommend it highly. It makes me appreciate all the burning of bras in the sixties. At last I can fully understand what that was about.

Anyway, I don't subject myself to the public (or vise-versa) without a bra on. If I'm going anywhere, even running to the store, I am fully "trussed up." But it sure is nice on the days I stay home all day.

You may wonder what the reaction of the genius is to this, but I can tell you he is the master of not noticing what I look like. In fact, he is almost completely unobservant when it comes to seeing what women are wearing. A girl I played tennis with once told me a story that proves my point.

She was working for IBM and it just happened that the genius was her manager. He assigned her to a very active account, and she was having to work long hours. She was so upset with him that she decided to try to make a point and wore the same dress three days in a row, hoping he would think she hadn't even had time to change clothes. Alas, it fell flat; he never picked up on it.

When she told me about the incident years later, I had a hearty laugh because I knew the plan would never have worked on the genius.

My writing was just interrupted by a call from the man himself and when he heard what the subject was, he said, "Omigosh! Now remember, this goes out to the world, I don't want hordes of people coming to our door!"

Isn't that fabulous?!? He believes that I could draw in a multitude just by saying I don't wear a bra at home.

Love truly is blind. BLESS HIM!!

A NEW JOURNEY ON A WAGON

Sometime in September I decided to quit drinking. People naturally ask why, and it's difficult to answer that question. What I tell them is that wine was becoming too important in my life -- i.e. it was controlling me instead of the other way around. But what has been very interesting to me is others' reaction to this news.

Most people have been very supportive. My family, in particular, has been wonderful and encouraging in this endeavor. I tell them to continue drinking in my presence --it really doesn't bother me, and most do. I still have a great time at parties, and lo and behold, the next day I remember what happened at them.

On the other hand, there have been those who are uncomfortable with my decision and have avoided me like the Plague. One couple whom we used to see almost every weekend has quit calling us. The last three times we were with them the husband said several times, "You're just no fun anymore." So it looks like we have actually lost friends over this.

The other night we dropped by the club for a sandwich in the lounge and ran into another couple we hadn't seen in a while. The wife for some reason always announces to whomever she is with that she is only having one glass of wine because she is driving. She refers to it several time during the conversation throughout the evening. I was used to that, but this time when I announced that I had quit, both of them were very interested. The husband, who drinks quite a bit himself, was very supportive, but the wife couldn't let it go.

She continued to ask me about my decision, plying me with questions. Finally, she said, "You just have to make up your mind ahead of time and have only one glass!"

I felt like saying, "Been there, done that, my dear; it just doesn't work!" But instead, I said, "I would really like to do that, but once I have one, I relax and my resistance goes south and before I know it, I've had three!"

With that, she tapped her head and replied, "It's all up here."

How do you answer that?!!

I graciously decided to let it drop and enjoy my meal!!

LOUNGING AT HOME

Ahhh, a day at home. Well, at least most of it. This afternoon I pick up Jay after basketball practice, then get Annie, take them to their house and wait for Jim IV to arrive (with dinner, I hope). But the rest of the day I will lounge at home and enjoy myself.

Yesterday I had bridge club at a gorgeous home about ten miles away from my house. In fact, it was on the same road that my parents built a house about 40 years ago. They had several enjoyable years there until Daddy had what they thought was a stroke (it was actually the onset of a brain tumor). Then they moved back into town so they could be closer to doctors, etc.

But this house I went to yesterday was built on the top of a hill overlooking a valley. Most of the valley has built up now, but there are still enough farms left to make you feel you are in a rural area.

There was a deck all across the back of the house and the great room where we played had a wall of windows overlooking the valley. I could hardly play bridge for looking at the view; maybe that's why my partner and I finished near the bottom. Oh well, my winning streak was bound to end at some point.

We had a delicious lunch of creamed chicken over cornbread, cranberry congealed salad, and peppermint ice cream over a brownie for dessert. I really wanted to nap afterwards.

The weather has turned warmer; maybe I will get some outside decorating done today. I do like it when the house looks festive for Christmas.

WONDERFUL THREE DAYS

Sometimes weekends turn out to be so-so and other times they are fabulous! The latter was the case for us this past weekend -- it was GREAT!!

It began on Friday night with my cousin David and his wife Betty who surprised us with a visit from Memphis. He was one of my "town" Mississippi cousins who grew up in Oxford, so of course we saw him every summer. We even stayed with them some when we were not "roughing it" out in the country with our other relatives. We loved to walk the 2-3 blocks to the square and have sundaes at his father's drugstore. (The store is there still, but it's a bookstore now.)

He did his undergrad work here at Vanderbilt and we grew closer during that time, going out a few times for a beer, if I remember correctly. He calls me occasionally when he comes to town on "lawyer" business. When he called this time, I quickly gathered up the sisters and husbands and we all convened at Sperry's, our favorite restaurant in Nashville. We really had a great time, laughing until we cried. David is sooo funny -- has that Lauderdale quick wit.

Then what can I say about Saturday? The genius and I were ecstatic over the Gator-Bama game. Now it's on to the National Championship bowl vs. Oklahoma.

Last night we attended a wonderful Christmas faculty party at the genius's school. It's always good to see everyone and have excellent food. We were somewhat anxious about the BCS selection and I finally called my cousin Jane who was monitoring the situation at home, and got the word that the Gators were definitely in the finals. She of course was interested in Ole Miss and where they were playing, but she gave me the news about Florida and we could relax and enjoy the party.

So a good time was had by us all weekend. I love seeing people I haven't seen in a while and partying with them.

Christmastime is great!!! If it just weren't sooooo COLD!!

NEW FRIEND (COUSIN?)

I finally got out to Hendersonville to visit BJ and Jerry and their new dog Monty. He is half Pomeranian and half Shih Tzu. What a little ball of fur he is. And so aggressive.

He chased Rufus around and around while Jesse sat on the sofa and watched. She was definitely above all the male antics!! Every time Monty would put his paws on the sofa where she was, she would growl at him. She, who is usually so mild. But Rufus and he had a blast. I'm sure he must be sleeping and resting now (Rufus is!) because all they did while I was there was run around and play.

Below are two pictures of them.

SELF-DIAGNOSING MY ILLNESS

Several people have questioned me about my illness in Florida. If it were a virus, why didn't anyone else get it? If it were food poisoning, why did it last so long? If it were salmonella-caused, it would have lasted longer, according to three medical people in my family. So I set out to do some research.

These are the facts in the case: 1) I ate raw oysters on Tuesday and Wednesday nights at two different restaurants. 2) On Saturday morning I woke up to diarrhea and fever. 3) The illness lasted five days.

According to my calculations, 86 hours passed between eating the first batch of oysters and the onset of symptoms. The second batch was eaten 62 hours before Saturday morning. The second restaurant was definitely not very clean; Brenda and I noticed some unsanitary practices when we ate there another night.

Now on to the research. I looked up salmonellosis (the virus caused by the salmonella germ) and it is caused from eating raw foods, such as eggs or oysters. The incubation period is anywhere from 12 - 72 hours. And it lasts from 4-7 days.

I'm convinced if anyone else isn't.

No more raw oysters (sob!!) for me!!

ANOTHER GENIUS TALE

While I was in Florida, the genius had lunch with his sister and her husband. She reminded him about an experience he had with his first BB gun when he was a child. I knew that he had always been a stickler for doing the right thing, and this story proves it.

He was about eight years old when he got his first BB gun, an event that occurred to many boys his age growing up in the South in the forties and fifties. His father told him he could shoot at starlings and sparrows, but killing any other kind of bird was illegal. So he set out to bag his first bird.

The problem was that sparrows were too small to hit and the feathers on a starling deflected any BB so effectively that it was almost impossible to bring one down. The only way to do it was to hit it right between the eyes.

One day he was trying yet again, and he got so discouraged he just turned his gun on a bright red cardinal and shot. You guessed it -- he hit it right between the eyes and he fell over instantly dead.

Before that bird even hit the ground the genius was crying hysterically. He knew he had done a terrible thing. When his father came home that night, of course he confessed his sin right away.

The genius suspects that his father was getting ready to tell him that he had done wrong, but had learned a good lesson when his son broke in with, "Daddy, I broke the law, and we have to report it!"

So the wise father took his son by the hand down the street to a neighbor who just happened to be a game warden. The man told him he would let him off this time, but not to do it again.

Then they went back home and buried the cardinal.

This little story shows the side of the genius's personality that is still very prevelant today: wrong behavior has consequences.

Just ask any student he has ever had!!